my heart is happy

you know what? God does answer prayer..... I am going to the beach tomorrow.

you may think this is silly, but to me it is definitely not. a month ago right after Ray and I broke up I poured my heart out to the Lord. let's just say He knew how much I would have loved to and longed to go to the beach this summer.

and i found out friday that tomorrow i am going to the Outer Banks. [and no i didn't even invite myself along with someone like i had first joked that i would!]

:) :) :)

I am SO blessed and cannot wait to relax, enjoy, and worship during these next few days.




in other news... i had a very exciting, random, fun/family filled weekend which i will definitely blog about if there is indeed internet at this beautiful OCEANFRONT house i will be at!!!

thoughts worth stating

i'm going to tennessee tomorrow. we're going to sarah's parents tomorrow and then on to nashville friday. i can't believe josh is getting married!!! sheesh. i'm in the midst of packing and i can't make decisions for the life of me.

today i almost made myself a lunch like an hour before i was supposed to go out to lunch because i forgot that i was going out to lunch. thankfully i remembered...

there's just something about writing a good long letter to a friend that's therapeutic.

i'm extremely not-tan but... that's okay. i guess. maybe i won't get skin cancer?

i guess it's kind of pointless to go on a walk/jog and then eat ben & jerry's.

ohh excitement occurred during my walk. i witnessed a lady being locked outside of her running car in her driveway because her little yorkie dog hit the lock button with his paw. she freaked out a little bit. but, thankfully the sun-roof was open and the windows were cracked. however, she had recently had surgery or something so she asked me to climb onto her car and reach inside next to the yippy dog and hit the unlock button. i didn't particularly want to climb onto her car and thankfully i successfully squeezed my hand through the front window enough to reach the back door unlock button. :) i felt like a good neighbor... and the dog only licked my hand like 10 times!

i got a pedicure today and it was delightful. no i do not get them often but i have had quite a few this past year for various reasons and i do enjoy them...

there were a group of ymca daycamper's in the center in the square building today. i had flashbacks to last summer and then got kind of nostalgic.

i finally got to hang out with allison for a few days. we had fun. :]

and isn't eva such a super cute/sweet kiddo? she brightens my softball games. and i'm glad we have red cheeks & curly hair in common. :)

friday nights

Today has actually been just what i needed. last night too for that matter. Funny how a month ago I really thought I would dread Friday nights... but, nope, they've actually been quite refreshing. :) I'm blessed by the girl friends who are willing to hang out with me & just lend a listening ear. I've definitely taken them for granted/never appreciated them quite so much. [except I should maybe not have coffee or chocolate late at night because I am super caffeine sensetive...resulting in this] and now i just want to go to Ireland. or prince of persia made me want to go to the outer banks... specifically to jockeys ridge. hmm. I think its time for bed. :)

Worth remembering

Although I love reading there have only been a few books that have really made an impact on me for some reason or another. Since it's late and I literally just finished one of these I'll wait to go into detail/response mode haha.

Why I Jumped - Tina Zahn
Unprotected - My version is by an anonymous author but, I think it's now being published by Miriam Grossman...
A Child Called IT - Dave Pelzer
The Atonement Child- Francine Rivers
The Unlikely Disciple - Kevin Roose
Crazy Love - Francis Chan
Choosing God's Best - Don Raunikar
Why I Stayed - Gayle Haggard

I'm sure there are more that deserve to be on this "list" but, for now those are the ones I'm quickly recalling and i know (for me) are worth remembering.

sugar cookies and boundaries

Today feels like it has been the longest day in the world. Which now that I think about it it's kind of ironic that I pulled up a new post not sure what to write about and that was the first statement that popped into me head... because one of my co-workers told me today that this is supposed to be the longest week of the year. Basically, I'm trying to say that yes, yes it is and yes, yes it feels like it.

Honestly, it's been easy to be negative lately. To see every possible glass as half empty. I'm not going to write about this right now... or dwell on it. But, i'm just bringing it up as a personal reminder: it doesn't help anything.

I've been reading quite a few blogs lately and I almost feel bad that I don't have deep revelations to share. But, to re-enforce my last post i am anticipating them. ;)

I was blessed to have the opportunity to "sub" and teach the jr. high class on sunday morning. When asked Thursday night I readily agreed because, well for one reason lots of people were nearby and i couldn't think of one exscuse or reason not to. (Is it horrible I was a little self-focused that night?) Out of all the age groups in my church I feel like this generation of jr.highs is the one that I am least closest to. I mean I've known these kids their entire lives... and, I don't spend much or any time around them so I have a hard time thinking of them as teenagers. (or close to it!) I've babysat their younger siblings and hung out with the high schoolers but... this group of kids not so much. I'm not sure if I'm explaining this well or not. Basically: I was excited to teach/serve/get to know them... yet, I was hesitant and really have not been feeling like I'm in a position to teach. I did spend time in prayer, look over the lesson, and even bake some pretty good sugar cookies! I was dealing with allergies/congestion/sinusinfectionwhatnot over the weekend and that sure didn't help my perspective. Sunday morning I was just feeling like I had no energy and began thinking of exscuses/reasons to not give it my best. (or my anything & just asking them to combine with the high schoolers haha) but, with some encouragement and perspective i changed my attitude. And, in the end everything went fine. [I even gave them a good laugh by tripping over a chair..] I mean I can't speak for what they got out of it but, I sure got more than I ever expected. :)

On the flip side, I have been practicing boundaries and gracefully said no to 2 different situations over the weekend. (maybe not the wisest move financially as far as not taking an extra shift at work...? oh well.) but, I was able to realize that physically and emotionally I just couldn't stretch myself anymore and I needed some time to do some other things and REST and you know what? that's okay :)

Alright it's time to end this super long day and this blog that is nothing like i originally intended it to be about. lol. until next time!

i'm back!

i'm sure no one is really surprised at this point that it's been 5 months since i last posted. i'm definitely not.

a lot has changed since january and i feel like i'm not going to have much excitement to blog about this summer. but, i'll try anyway.

someone asked me on facebook chat the other night how life was. i took a few minutes to really ponder the question before giving an answer. all i could say was that it is not how i thought it would be. i'm not going to get lost in a world of "what ifs" but, i will say that i am not where i thought i would be at this point/age. and that's okay. do my plans for my life ever work out the way i want them too? nope. and that's a good thing.

so although i won't have much exciting to write about i do feel as if i'm going to learn some valueable lessons & have some great experiences that i'll want to digest & record through writing in the next few months.... we'll just have to see. :)